Will Dockery
2012-11-05 17:16:13 UTC
Over You
"Sitting by the porthole, you're on my mind. Hearing the waves crash,
storm
outside, out of sight, out of time. Sailing through these memories,
should
have seen the signs. Dragon pulling me back, three ring circus of
reason and
rhyme. Over you, just me getting over you. Over you, as we see our way
through. You been down to the bottom baby. Hey, I've been there too.
Once
thought those who'd suffered together could see it all the way
through. But
you gave up trying baby, and I guess I gave up too. None of the King's
Mojo
or all your charms could hold up this tattered rendezvous. Over you,
just me
getting over you. Over you, as we see our way through. Sometimes when
I had
it, I treated it like dirt. Overlooked the finer points of why the
whole
thing worked. But you know I don't want sympathy and neither of us
plan to
die. None of us know the answers and we don't even want to hear the
questions why. Over you, just me getting over you. Over you, as we see
our
way through... yeah." -Will Dockery ©2012 (Music with Brian Mallard &
Jack
Snipe)
http://www.reverbnation.com/play_now/song_13207558
The prose style makes it harder for me to read -- and normally I'd"Sitting by the porthole, you're on my mind. Hearing the waves crash,
storm
outside, out of sight, out of time. Sailing through these memories,
should
have seen the signs. Dragon pulling me back, three ring circus of
reason and
rhyme. Over you, just me getting over you. Over you, as we see our way
through. You been down to the bottom baby. Hey, I've been there too.
Once
thought those who'd suffered together could see it all the way
through. But
you gave up trying baby, and I guess I gave up too. None of the King's
Mojo
or all your charms could hold up this tattered rendezvous. Over you,
just me
getting over you. Over you, as we see our way through. Sometimes when
I had
it, I treated it like dirt. Overlooked the finer points of why the
whole
thing worked. But you know I don't want sympathy and neither of us
plan to
die. None of us know the answers and we don't even want to hear the
questions why. Over you, just me getting over you. Over you, as we see
our
way through... yeah." -Will Dockery ©2012 (Music with Brian Mallard &
Jack
Snipe)
http://www.reverbnation.com/play_now/song_13207558
urge you to break this into lines -- but I like this; it has a nice
stream-of-consciousness sound and feel to it. (I think the abcb rhyme
and near-rhymes help there -- if all the lines had perfect rhymes
they'd be jumping out and crying to be line ends, but near rhymes like
"worked/dirt", interspersed with unrhymed lines, keep the rhyme from
taking over).
As a bonus, "Over You" will stand out when printed like this in a set
of lyrics.
http://www.playgroundsmag.com
Vickie streamed the text into a narrow oblong box and had the computer
break the text up at random, and that turned out pretty cool as well.
short (even one-word) lines that didn't pull their weight.
On the other hand, though, I immensely enjoyed your prose piece in
that column, "Ayn Rand and the Purpose of the Creator". Considering
that, if Rand gets mentioned at all these days, it's usually by
someone vilifying her, it was nice to see something that presented her
thought in a positive light.
I did think you were far too kind to Paul Ryan; IMO, someone with his
voting record either (a) doesn't understand Rand at all (which I don't
believe, as he seems bright enough); or (b) doesn't believe what he's
read (which isn't credible either; if he doesn't like what she says,
why bring her up at all), or (c) refuses to let his beliefs get in the
way of his political career (which seems the most likely option). In
that respect, he reminds me of the Washington insiders in ''Atlas
Shrugged'' who are forever telling Rearden and Dagny that, while what
they say may be right, one has to be "practical" and act as if it
weren't.
But that's a minor quibble, since Ryan's role in the piece was minor;
in the column he came across as more the occasion or the excuse to
talk about Rand, and he worked well enough in that respect.
*** Thanks again, George...
And a question on your observations of the "New" Google Groups.
I'm finding many or most posts made from there don't seem to be coming over
to Usenet at large. Wasn't there something noted last year that Google was
severing ties with Usenet?
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Over You / Will Dockery & The Shadowville All-Stars:
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